Can We Raise Our Kids “Gratefully?”

A few weeks ago we took the kids whale watching. The boat had barely pulled out of the dock and the boys were so animated pointing to all the things they could see. “Look a buoy!” “Look a pelican!” They were just so excited to be on a boat and see anything.

This man was sitting next to us. We got to chatting with him while the boys happily pointed out sea lions on the rocks and a pelican. He said to us, “That age is so great. They are so excited.” He went on to tell us how he had been in Hawaii on a snorkeling boat. He said it was fairly expensive ($100 per person) and the water was so pretty with lots of fish to see. He said this couple had two boys around ages 10 and 12 that seemed bored. One of them said to the mom, “I thought you said this was going to be fun.” He told us that he just couldn’t believe it.

Over the past few weeks I have been thinking about what he said. I can’t believe kids could be bored doing something that fun or that my kids may go from being this excited to bored being on a boat in Hawaii when they are older. But it must happen. I have seen families in restaurants where the parent is sitting there quietly and the kids are on their cell phones texting. I rarely see parents happily talking to their teenagers.

Even on my recent flight to Las Vegas this girl had a headband on that said “21″ and was with what looked like her grandparents. At first I was thinking what cool grandparents she must have and what an open mind to go to Vegas with them! But then I noticed she was wearing headphones while standing next to them and kept missing everything they said to her.

So will my boys one day be irritated that I made them go on a snorkeling boat in beautiful, warm water? Will they have their headphones on and ignore me when we get on the flight?

My Mom took my sister and I to Hawaii when were 8 and 11. We grew up with very little money so a splurge like Hawaii was such a big deal. I don’t even know if I slept the week before we went. We went snorkeling, to a water park, and played at the beach. I remember even then thinking it was so great and we were lucky. It was the only time we ever flew with my Mom and I think it was one of the last (if not the last) vacation we took with her.

Thinking of my trip as a child, I can’t imagine expressing boredom or irritation to be on a boat for an expensive snorkeling tour. I really can’t imagine what would have happened to me if I had!

It has me wondering if it’s growing up with very little money that makes you appreciate a trip to Hawaii or is it something more? Do we assume the kids in the man’s story were spoiled? In my story about Hawaii my mom was so excited too. She had it all planned out what we were doing each day and she took a ton of pictures when we were there. Was her shared excitement what made it so fun for us?

I am hoping we can raise our kids “gratefully,” and have them keep the same childlike wonder they have now and their same enthusiasm. Now we just need to know if anyone else knows how to do that?