Why Being a “Mompreneur” Isn’t Actually a Good Thing

I tried to keep it all neat and tidy, I really did. I work from home during school hours and then put on my “Mom” hat at 2:00 p.m. But of course, life happens and nothing about parenting is neat and tidy. There are sick days, calls from the nurse’s office for injuries, doctor’s appointments, orthodontist and dentist appointments. There are the days when the kids just plain don’t want to go to school and your peaceful morning becomes a negotiation and pulling out your best “you can do this” speech – which is mixed with your “you really need to get out of here” needs.

There is the time off. The wondering if they are ever really at school with all the holidays, “pupil free” days, early outs and of course summer.

And there is the fact that it really can’t all be done before 2:00 p.m. because that’s also when you prep dinner to squeeze between their afternoon activities, get in your own exercise and shower (fingers crossed). You are left wondering how to get anything done without allowing them to sit in front of a screen for hours when they get home and of course when you have to deal with the homework drama.

I’ve done my best for years to keep these parts working together. I’ve often told my husband that it’s a good thing I do work from the home because I probably would’ve been fired for missing work between the two of them these past few months (years?).

Which is of course the benefit of working from home, but it’s also the strain, isn’t it?

Somewhere along the way I heard the term “Mompreneur” and thought it was great. I thought “That’s me!” when I heard it. Yes, I’m a Mom and I’m an entrepreneur.

What I didn’t anticipate is the stress of that word.

What I didn’t anticipate is the strain of being a Mompreneur which really has this sense of trying to do it all. It sounds powerful like we can parent and business at the same time and be empowered (and wealthy) as we do it.

And really, can we?

An entrepreneur is focused on being an entrepreneur and turning ideas into gold, or into green actually. If you have to stop because your child somehow tripped over his own two feet running the mile in shoes you told him were terrible for running, to pick him up at the nurse’s office because he “can’t bare weight on his leg” your whole day is shot to s#*t, if I’m being honest.

If you are holding a call and your kids are home for summer there’s a good chance they will want your attention and a fight could break out that starts with pool noodles and ends with one pinning the other down and you have to jump in to separate them.

And it gets tiring planning ways to wear them out so they can’t barely get off the couch to bother you while you work.

If they are home sick they want their Mom and it’s very hard to leave them in the other room as you worry if their fever is spiking. If they are too quiet and you don’t know what is happening it’s not easy to focus, not easy at all!

The Mompreneur role is for the birds, I tell you! It implies that we can multi-task and do it all and we just can’t. No one can. It’s a recipe for burnout.

I’m giving myself permission to separate the word and be both a Mom and an Entrepreneur and I hope you do the same. Which means I invite resources in to help me.

Which means I admit I cannot do it all. I cannot do a WHOLE job in less than 20 hours per week that would take others 60 hours a week to do in an office.

I can’t get all the household needs done like cooking and cleaning, while simultaneously being a Mom and an Entrepreneur.

I accept that I can’t keep it all perfect and never expect to be interrupted on a call and trust that it will all go according to plan and consider it akin to a technology problem that can happen. I now understand that there may be a time when I need to reschedule or throw in a freebie as a way to manage this “work-at-home-but-I-have kids dilemma.” (Which I know I’m not alone in doing and it’s not just moms!)

Being a Mompreneur implies we can somehow do it all – and many moms are doing it all, but at what cost?

I tell you, I had my bloodwork done recently and my minerals have been depleted in this effort to have it all and do it all, frequently running on empty. My poor adrenals and nervous system are no longer happy and they are letting me know with my blood pressure and racing heart.

If we truly desire to be a business owner, we need to give ourselves that freedom to operate as a business owner. Which means finding help where we need it, exploring tools that make our lives easier – like a house cleaner or using a grocery delivery service. And we need to give ourselves permission to embrace the hot mess of the life of a person who works out of the home with kids.

It gives us the permission to arrange babysitting swaps with the neighbors, or have spouses take on some of the appointments and the ailments that come along and remember that just because we are home, doesn’t mean our work can wait.

Because it can’t always wait.

Being a Mom is very important to me and something I love being.

Being a business owner and having a career that fills me up is something I equally love.

So I give myself permission to be a Mom AND be an entrepreneur and NOT try to do it all at once to the point of exhaustion.

Are you with me?

“I give myself permission to be a Mom and an Entrepreneur” and enlist the support to help with having two full time jobs.

The truth is, if you try to do both at the same time you end up not really present for either. And that’s not good!

There is no one-size-fits-all approach to navigate this and I’d love to hear what is working for you and what isn’t in this regard. Are you loving your kids but getting pretty tired of multi-tasking until your brain is fried? Are there “Dadpreneurs” or are they just called entrepreneurs and Dads? I’d love to hear what you think about this in the comments.

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Nicole is the Creator/Editor for Mind Over Messy. She has two "spirited" boys and a family that loves adventure. From enjoying a home cooked meal to night snorkeling in Hawaii, you can find it on this website. If you're interested in Guest Posting on MindOverMessy.com, click HERE for more information.

 

Nicole is the Creator/Editor for Mind Over Messy. She has two "spirited" boys and a family that loves adventure. From enjoying a home cooked meal, meditating, being present for even the most challenging moments, to night snorkeling in Hawaii, you can find it on this website. If you're interested in Guest Posting on MindOverMessy.com, click HERE for more information.